From stuntmen to Swifties – the political awards of the year | Politics | News
BALDRICK OF THE YEAR
The Tories spent the first half of the year tanking in the polls but Rishi Sunak had a cunning plan.
He sprang a July election on the country and legions of Tories are still trying to figure out why. The Conservatives won 251 fewer seats than in 2019 while Sir Keir Starmer reaped a landslide victory.
Mr Sunak has been a good sport about this cataclysmic result, joking in the Commons that “before you know it you have a bright future behind you and you’re left wondering whether you can credibly be an elder statesman at the age of 44”.
SHOWBIZ BREAKTHROUGH OF THE YEAR
Sir Jacob Rees-Mogg brought the spirit of a West End musical to election night by quoting from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. He quipped that “from the ashes of disaster grow the roses of success”.
He has since starred with his family in a reality television show. It can only be a matter of time before JRM is mooted as the next 007.
SWIFTIE OF THE YEAR
Sir Keir Starmer probably thought it was a fun idea to post online a photo of himself at a Taylor Swift concert with his wife shortly before the election. But when he moved into Downing Street he was consumed by “freebie-gate”.
Hacks pointed out he had been gifted more hospitality and freebies than any other MP since 2019. The best things in life are free – and this is especially true if you lead the Labour party.
THE TOM CRUISE “I do my own stunts!” AWARD
Sir Ed Davey once had a reputation as a diligent but rather staid MP. But come the election he transformed into a daredevil action man, paddle-boarding, riding in a giant teacup, swing-dancing and bungee-jumping with the glee of Buster Keaton.
The Liberal Democrat tally of seats shot up to 72, so we can expect other party leaders to follow his example. We look forward to seeing Sir Keir Starmer and Kemi Badenoch’s custard pie-fight at Prime Minister’s Questions.
BEST LOSER OF THE YEAR
Former Brexit minister Steve Baker did not sound at all distraught at losing his seat, declaring: “Thank God I’m a free man.” Earlier, when asked what he would do if he lost, he instantly replied: “Skydiving, motorcycling, fast catamaran sailing.”
We hope he is having fun.
FAWLTY TOWERS CATERING AWARD
Sir Keir Starmer hosted a glittering Diwali celebration but eyebrows were raised when meat and alcohol were served. Downing Street admitted a “mistake was made”.
FRIEND OF THE FARMERS PRIZE
Debating can be thirsty work and Steve Witherden – whose Montgomeryshire and Glyndwr constituency contains much idyllic countryside – was reprimanded for drinking form a carton of milk in the Commons chamber. His spokesman said he “would certainly not be ashamed of supporting British dairy farmers”.
HOMERIC PRIZE FOR PROMOTING APPRECIATION OF THE CLASSICS
Boris Johnson was famed for dropping classical allusions at every opportunity and his latest successor, Kemi Badenoch, also likes a good drenching in Greek mythology.
In the throes of the Tory leadership contest she described getting home around midnight and watching the animation Blood of Zeus. She said: “It’s got lots of gore and violence and some fake history, and it’s entertaining.”
OLIVER TWIST AWARD FOR A TOUGH CHILDHOOD
Anyone who called Rishi Sunak “dishy” in his youth wasn’t referring to the presence of a satellite dish at the family home. His GP dad and pharmacy-running mother sent him to Winchester for his schooling but did not pay for him to enjoy multi-channel entertainment.
Ahead of the election, the then-PM said there were “all sorts of things that I would’ve wanted as a kid that I couldn’t have”, including “famously, Sky TV”. He may have more time now to catch up on the programmes he missed in his youth.
BLINK AND YOU MISS IT PREMIERSHIP OF THE YEAR
Labour has never been out of power in Wales since the first days of devolution but things can still go badly wrong for a First Minister.
Vaughan Gething announced he would quit after just 118 days amid uproar about a campaign donation. It takes years to climb up what Disraeli called the “greasy pole” of politics but you can slide down it in seconds.
SPANISH INQUISTION AWARD FOR HARD-HITTING INTERVIEW
Home Secretary Yvette Cooper appeared on Good Morning Britain and fielded questions not just from presenter Kate Garraway but also her husband Ed Balls. Mr Balls said he had “rarely seen her at all in the last week” – at least he didn’t ask her to remind him what night the bins go out.
HERO OF THE YEAR
No irony here – this was a moment all of us who are fortunate enough to have a perch in the Commons press gallery will never forget. Craig Mackinlay, whose hands and feet were amputated after a horredous attack of sepsis, walked into the chamber with new prosthetic limbs.
There were cheers on every side of the House and he declared he wanted to be the “bionic MP”. He is now in the House of Lords and admired across the party spectrum for his blazing courage.
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